Impossible Questions, Part III

"What do you do for a living?"

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I suppose this is not a hard question for someone who has a career (or even a job), or who actively fulfills some particular purpose or role in life. 

Image by Alexa from Pixabay

​It wasn’t a hard question for me before Rod died because I had an answer: I worked part-time for a missions organization. When I wasn't there, I was a stay-at-home mom, homeschooling my kids, and I was a wife. I was fulfilling my life’s role and passion - I knew the worth of what I did, and the value I held as a participant in fulfilling them.

Now all I hear is What do you produce, or how do you contribute to society? And because our society in general puts a high value on productivity, I hear this as a question about my worth and as a human being in this world.

And I got nothin’.

A person's occupation is typically the means to - and an indication of - their productivity. I don’t have a career, or even a job (as ‘job’ is typically defined for our society). The implication is, then, without a job, I am not productive; if I am not producing or contributing to society, then I am a drain on it. 

Luckily, I’m of the age that I can reasonably say I’m retired, but I’m not sure exactly what I am retired from - a part-time data entry job that I haven’t held in over a decade? But even saying I’m retired comes with its own cultural expectations, and to be honest, those expectations aren’t very high. Retirees aren’t expected to be producers; in fact, they are often considered a drain on resources. 

So where does that leave me? 

Feeling defeated and deflated, that's where. This question calls my attention to my unimportance and insignificance as a person in our society. 

Wow. It’s no wonder I dread this question! So what are my options when this question is hurled at me?

First, I will choose not to accept society’s measuring stick when determining my worth. It’s taken me some time, but I’ve learned that my value is not wrapped up in what I do - for a living or otherwise. Even if no one else sees it.

Second, I’ll consider how I might reframe the question … 

What am I doing today that is meaningful to me?