One Crafty Widow - Widow Life

One Crafty Widow

Impossible Questions, Part II

7/9/2022

With a houseful of out of town family and friends here for the services, people were taking care of me, and one another as we all shared our grief together.

If we were running low on breakfast foods, someone just went out and got it. If something needed to be done at the house or for the upcoming service, someone just did it.

No one asked what I needed; they were there and they just saw what was needed and did it.

Image by Dimitri Wittmann from Pixabay

Impossible Questions, Part I

7/9/2022

We know how the customary greeting goes:

"How are you doing?"
"Fine, thanks. And you?"
"Doing great, thanks!"

We just follow the script, hardly noticing that there is even a question being asked.

Until we lose our partner.

What If ...

7/24/2021

In his book, Socrates Cafe, Christopher Phillips writes, “Whenever I first philosophize with a group of kids, I bring a glass half filled with water. And I ask the kids, ‘Is the glass half empty or half full?’ The last time I did this with a group of kids ... they argued among themselves that the glass has to be one or the other, either empty or full. They never considered other possibilities.”

Sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? I mean, what other possibilities are there?

So ... This Is Who I Am Now?

5/4/2021

I remember receiving my first evite (since before the pandemic) to an in person event. Having not been vaccinated yet, declining was a pretty easy decision for me to make.

But by the time of the invitation, most everyone was getting back to pre-pandemic life; COVID was no longer an acceptable reason to decline. I was surprised when I felt some amount of anxiety over my decision. I don’t think I’d ever experienced this kind of anxiety before.

Single Woman In A Man's World

4/15/2021

As a woman now without a man, I must figure out how to navigate the gender line if I wish to be heard.

My first real opportunity to experience what it's like to live as a single woman in a man's world was through an interaction I had with a contractor. I took the opportunity to use my voice and to exercise control over things I actually had control over, and I experienced first-hand the consequences of living into those two things.

Cupid Can Keep His Arrows

2/7/2021

Life is full of storms, both in the weather and in heart They blow in, affecting everyone in their paths, and are no respecter of persons - or emotions.

And, friends, there’s a big one blowing in this week. And right out in front, winging himself ahead of the billowing storm clouds of emotions, is Cupid himself, arrows loaded and ready to fly.

Rod's Widow

1/30/2021

What does Widow do?

Where is her place in the world and what is her purpose?

These answers aren’t as clear cut as Wife was in our American society. The cultural norms associated with it are sparse and vague, and, like Widow herself, no one wants to talk about it.

Image by Sabine van Erp from Pixabay

Not Rod's Wife Anymore

1/20/2021

As a little girl growing up in the 1960s, my role in life was pretty much set for me. Sure, there was room for some variation, but the cultural norms dictated that I would graduate high school, go to college, get married, have kids, and live happily ever after.

I followed the script and it suited me well; I loved being Wife. Wife was how I interfaced with my world and everyone in it. It was how I knew who I was; it defined my responsibilities in the home, my place in the world, and my purpose in life.

Happy New ... Day?

1/7/2021

It's 2014.

Days keep passing.
Things are trying to normalize.

I’ve even thought how ready I am to get the Christmas tree down and get my house back to ...

Back to what?

Holiday-Whobie-Whatie?

12/26/2020

Borrowing a phrase form The Grinch, Christmas became as foreign to me as the Whobilation was to him.

***********

All my growing up, Christmas Day was very full. It gathered food, presents, and people like a snowball gathers snow. And coming from a large family, Rod’s Christmas Day celebration was similar to mine - only he gathered a bigger snowball by the end of the day.